✨💕Just let it out! Rant!💕✨

_love-yourself_

✨💕Just let it out! Rant!💕✨


102 4
Ok, first comment yay! I just noticed a girl I am friends with has tons of cuts and it is not the first time that it happens to me that people I care about self-harm badly (I have too) but sometimes I have to carry my whole group of friends because they have social issues and they always ask me for help because I love to help them and support them but I wish someone stood up for me when I need it but I don't say it, I want to be as helped as I help the others, I need to be selfish for once but I just can't
I think I like my best friend, he is so sweet and kind... omg and I think he likes me !!! but im not sure and im scared of asking him because what if i ruin our friendship? I have been debating whether or not to tell him how I feel. His best friend told me he was going to ask me out ... but he never did ???? Is that a sign omg im just scared cause i truly care about him... I wish I could just tell him that .
tomorrow I'm leaving on a church trip with a bunch of teenagers from my church and I did it last year too and I loved it so that's why I'm doing it again but for some reason it's giving me really bad anxiety and I'm really scared and I don't want to go anymore but I can't back out now and I don't understand why I'm not excited cuz I really liked it last year?? idk but also its march now and that starts the one year anniversary of the start of my depression (march to may) and it's making me question whether I'll ever be happy again cuz there was a point in time last year where I was so convinced that once the school year ended I would go back to the way I was before but obviously that didn't happen so if it's not school that's making me so freaking sad, then what the heck is it?? and how do I get happy again?? how do I go back to the way I was before this whole mess started?? but I guess I could look at it in a different view: that I actually made it! it's been a year and I'm still alive! so this anniversary could be taken as a celebration or a regression and I'm not sure which I want more? I know it seems obvious cuz like don't you want to celebrate and be happy instead of sad? and yeah I do but for some reason I want to be sad? I feel like trying to be happy only suppresses the sadness and covers it in layers of "it'll be okay. I'm okay" which I've kinda been doing since the start of 2017 and I don't like it. it's exhausting and I don't know I just kinda want to let the darkness consume me for a little while. maybe go back to listening to npi and keeping my eyes on the ground and crying every night. this anniversary also marks the one year anniversary of my brother's diagnosis, so that's been pretty hard. he's okay now and he's as healthy as he can be with his condition (thank god) but this anniversary is reminding me of the nights my mom would cry on the deck and the dozens of grocery trips for gluten free dairy free food and wàtching him lay on the couch and wàtch movies and get thinner and thinner and how he looked so small in his suit for prom and how his girlfriend was at our house constantly and how freaking confused we were. sorry that was a lot lol
ok i'm done thanks for posting this
deleting what i said bc i'm embarrassed
There's this girl who constantly follows me around. I don't want to be mean, but I'm seriously about to explode! 😡
thank you so much! I fixed my problem and that was a big boost!
I've heard of The Cab, but I've never listened to their music. Starset: Favourite song: Carnivore, telepathic, diè for you, Everglow. Song that means something to me: Diè for you Why: I want someone who loves me so much that they would die for me I guess.
Starset is fluffing awesome. I've heard Angel with a Shotgun! I actually really like it. I'll try them ouy
Out sometime. I think theyre on my list actually
Thank you so much for understanding☺️💜 You're so kind and supportive💜
Thanks! I will try that 😊
soooooooo, where do I start? so I go to this art class once a wk and there's this assistant teacher that pretty much does nothing the whole time but stare at what I'm doing and he pulls up chairs behind me and watches my every move. he holds doors open for me WHICH I HATE!!! and I let him know that by making faces at him like he was weird. now I know it's normal for boys to open doors for girls but I'm a tomboy and he doesn't know it and also he blushes whenever he opens the door to. I hate him so much I wish he didn't exist. I know it's terrible but I HATE HIM!!! and also anyone that has a crush on me. but he's to old for me anyways. he's 16 i just turned 13, and I don't want a boy friend. the thing is I look old for my age cuz I'm tall. so he probably thinks I'm 14 or 15 idk.. HES JJST RLY RLY ANNOYING AND U HATE HIM AND I WANT HIM TO GO AWAY!!! what do I do? 😡
ty I'm not gonna talk to him cuz he's rly awkward but I'll figure out something tysm!!! 💕
I am so sick and tired. I'm sick and tired of people treating me like less just because I'm female and Spanish. oh, to top it off, I'm not straight either. talk about a triple whammy. and I know that people have real problems, and I feel super petty complaining about this. "Some people have real problems." I'm sick of society telling us that we have to look and act a certain way to be seen as "beautiful ". Anyways, I'm sorry for dumping this on you
I have these two friends who are really making me miserable. They make fun of me all the time and leave me out. I kinda feel like a third wheel. Whenever they upset me I just deal with it, which probably isn't a good idea but I'm not very good at holding grudges. But whenever I do something that upsets them, even if it's accidentally stepping on their toe or something I get yelled at! I don't know what to do! I try to distance myself but they won't let me leave, I try to join in but they try to get rid of me! please help!
thank you so much for the advice!
thanks!
This school year has been the worst year for me so far. My best friend ran away in the beginning of year, and i was so worried about her safety, that i couldnt sleep for months and i had terrible anxiety. Worse was that the police didnt seem to believe my statements! Thankfully though she came back home, but now my parents don't trust me, and idk why! Also the guidance counselor thinks i need help, which i dont! And after this whole experience my mom has been sad because her sister ran away when she was little and i feel guilty that i brought up bad memories for her. And its so hard to keep up with school work (I have a lot of academic pressure) because of all this stress. My grades are slipping but i just dont seem to care anymore. I also hate that my friend and i have been acting so awkward for the last couple of months! I dont know how to approach the topic of her running away with her either!!!! thanks for letting me rant! This actually really helped!!