I have to go to a party tomorrow and part of me is so freaking excited but the part of me that has anxiety is just crying on the inside.

I am also trying not to sleep because I hate sleeping but love it at the same time like I hate the fact that you are just unconscious for a couple of hours and the world keeps on going without you.

^^Jeez, that was kinda deep

For those that are wondering what I am doing, it is currently 2am where I live and I am writing this while using my last drops of energy

HALP I JUST HEARD A NOSE AND I AM THE ONLY ONE AWAKE

I meant noise omg I am laughing so hard right know.

I was almost busted thanks to my lunatic fit of laughter

I wish tomorrow wouldn't come because I still have homework to do and all I want to do is watch movies and stay home but I can't AND life is just ugh

Why the heck was the word and autocorrected to caps lock? Am I THAT crazy?

People that look at this post are going to think that different people commented on this but nope it's just me talking to myself in the middle of the night

*heavily sighs*

I need to stop but I can't

Oh my gods this reminds me of when Emi was doing something like this and got to like 100 comments. wonder if I can do that

I feel like I should have said something at the beginning like "welcome to late night thoughts with your host awkward stela" or something like that. meh, too late now.

I find it funny how I am comfortable with the thought of you guys reading this stuff but am mortified of the thought of any people I know in real life reading this.

guys I think I am going crazy every picture I look at seems to be a gif.

Or maybe I actually need sleep, but I am A STRONG AND INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DON'T NEED SLEEP

IM TRYING, IM TRYING TO SLEEP

BUT I CANT BUT I CANT WHEN YOU ALL HAVE GUNS FOR HANDSSS

I am doing my best to not sing along to Guns For Hands

I feel so lonely

I need friends

and some serious help

I must seem crazy to all of you

WELL, ITS BECAUSE I AM MUAHAHAHAHA

I hate the fact that people will judge you based on how you look. I mean, do you judge a pizza? no, because a pizza is a pizza and not a thing that depends on you opinion. A HUMAN BEING is a beautiful, strong, independent, smart and amazing thing that doesn't depend on society's opinion.

I also hate how I've ran out of space in my bookshelves and need a new one.

she had striking and beautiful amber eyes the same color of tree sap speared by sunlight or thick, golden honey. a mane of warm brown hair framed her face and a constellation of freckles adorned her cheeks.

^Do you like that? I really enjoy writing stuff like that so I might post some pieces of writing by yours truly.

Do you have any weird abilities?

Yes, I do. I can, uh, move my nose, if that makes any sejse.

that is NOT how you spell sense. I go and write stuff like that description but then go and spell like that.

32 comments, wow stela, wow.

do you want to hear a story? yes. okay I'll tell you one

Okay, so once when I was around 7 my dad took me to an amusement park and they had a 3D cinema and they had spongebob thingy paling and my dad took me to watch it and I sat right in the middle of the room and suddenly Patrick pulls out a chainsaw and since it was 3D it looked like it was real and me being the scaredy cat I am I started crying and that my frens is how I became terrified of 3D movies. hope you enjoyed

*playing what in the living heck does paling mean?

Does it bother anyone else that somebody else has your name? no because my name is freaking weird and nobody has it.

sum up your life in one emoji. okay:😑or 😬

are you cringy! is that even a question?

*?

lol in my head I thought cringy! at the disco

I mean, if I was dancing at a disco it WOULD be cringy af

DO I SEEM CRAZY TO YOU?¿

I feel like I should not be in my house but i should be in a asylum

help frens

do you ever feel like committing suicide and just die but at the same time you want to see the entire world and make your dreams come true?

WHAT

AM

I

DOING

????

somebody help me pLEASE

does anybody have any book recommendations? yes I do. Oh really, what books? well Cuckoo Song by Frances Hardinge is amazing if you want to get in the Halloween spirit during Christmas (jk but it's actually a really good book you should check it out).

I feel like writing a novel, traveling around the world, have a movie marathon but I am just TOO LAZY.

I am not reading anything I am writing so I am 500% sure there is some serious shizzle whizzle in these comments.

oH MY LORD 55 comments am I okay?!

I CAN SHOW YOU MY WORLD, CRAZINESS EVERYWHEREEEEEE

the breeze of my thought whispers, 'is this girl okay?'

and my brain screams in heavy metal 'OF COURSE SHE ISN'T YOU LUNATIC WHY WOULD YOU THINK SO THIS WOMAN IS READY TO ROCK!!GO WILDCATS'

I definitely belong in a asylum. but only if my books are there with me

and my tøp music, of course

I hate the fact that people get annoyed when a person with anxiety says something like 'can you come with me please?' or 'can you just be there for me?' because they sound clingy ir like they need a person to survive. DO NOT GET ANNOYED AT THEM YOU SHOULD FEEL LOVED BECAUSE THAT PERSON TRUSTS YOU ENOUGH TO ASK YOU TO HELP THEM.

*or

*wipes glasses (which don't exist)* ladies and gentlemen, you have met the true me, feel free to be concerned (ooh tøp reference) and terrified.

frens I cannot explain how I feel right now. I feel dead I feel alive I feel happy I feel sad I feel empty I feel full of this life.

hELP ME PLEASE

no seriously guys I think I wildcat to sleep at least

*will try OMG I HATE AUTOCORRECT SO MUCH UGHHH

I shall go now

BAIIIIII

I'm good fren! thank you for asking💜I'm really happy cuz I just have to go to school on Monday and half of Tuesday and then I'm on break yay! also my brother came home from college for the break and I love him a lot so that has made me happy. how are you fren?

I just went through everything I said/typed last night and I have no idea what was going on.