and oof it makes my hands hurt 🤠

y’all my creative side is blossoMING idk if I’m hypomanic and it’s just super managed by my meds but I’m the most productive ever dhdbjdbd I ordered all of my wedding supplies and have more than half the money left for a honeymoon, I’m a week ahead in my class, I’m playing video games???, I’m spending more time with every animal and getting them exercise, I’m exercising and eating right, I’m working on music, I’m doing makeup for fun, I’m getting dressed in something I feel pretty in every morning.... what’s happening bruh

*yells* iM SLEEPING CORRECTLY-

pretty sure I’m low key hypomanic but I’m taking it because this is great

AND IM TURNING 19 IN TWO WEEKS so that’s exciting 😂😂 I’m hoping my fam + in laws + Jeremy will all come out to eat at Buffalo Wild Wings with me and then the next day since it’s Saturday I want to see if my mom would want to go to the petting zoo near her house because it’s only $5 and I love those animals... I’ve posted photos from when I went there before if y’all remember. but I set out six diff cute outfits for the week since it’s Easter Sunday and then Friday is my birthday and I’m in the mood for life guys like wow... pretty much finished my resume yesterday too

I’m so happy your doing well!! those Easter eggs are hands down gorgeous👏🏼😩

Unfortunately being vegan is not a thing in Wisconsin (it's called America's Dairyland and I live in pretty vegan-unfriendly part of it). I would absolutely LOVE to work at a vegan restaurant but there just isn't anything here

Before I rant about the protein thing, I get what you mean, it's hard, but small steps are good, too. A vegan diet is just so much more healthy (look into the Whole Foods Plant Based way of eating if you're curious), and I really love animals and that just doesn't make sense if I'm supporting industries that mistreat them.

(I'm not trying to like lecture you or anything, I'm just saying why I do it)

okay so rant warning but PLANTS HAVE PROTEIN beans have protein, nuts have protein, whole grains have protein (quinoa is actually a complete protein), SO many plants have protein. I just get so tired of it because NO ONE seems to understand that. The ONLY thing you cannot get from a vegan diet is vitamin B12 (which has to be supplemented to meat anyway, so I just take a supplement and I'm fine), and vitamin D, which your body makes from sun exposure and the sun doesn't shine where I live so I would have to take a supplement anyway (they also supplement milk with vitamin D because so many people are deficient). As long as you're eating a variety of whole, healthy plant foods, you should be fine nutritionally. Okay sorry haha, rant over

I’m so happy for and proud of you!!!! Get in those feelings girl!!!!!! so about my makeup for prom i also wanted to do something natural and not stand out-ish and my mom and I shopped for makeup today and there was a lip color I really wanted bc it was more natural but my mom bought me a different shade bc she wants me to stop hiding and stand out more and i hatE IT SO MUCH IVE ALREADY CRIED TWICE it’s waayyyyy more of a berry color I guess?? and it goes okay ish w my dress buT it’s soooo bold on me. well idk it’s just not what I’m used to. so I was hoping Emma could use it so my mom didn’t waste seven dollars but Emma said she wants to use some purple shade her friend has that’s coming over to do her makeup (even though I’m p sure her friend like never wears makeup so if it flops ha deal w it) so now my mom is mad at me and said she’ll take me to the dollar store tomorrow instead of Walmart. who knows I may end up liking the lipstick?? agghhhh I literally don’t even want to go anymore but I bought my ticket this morning. I’m numBER 542. FIVE. HUNDRED. AND. FORTY. TWO. and the amount of people goes up by one hundred each day. !! that’s too!! man y ! peo p Le for me!!!! ALSO I have to do Emma’s hair anD WAX HER EYEBROWs for her bc she “doesn’t know how to do it herself”????? and tomorrow we might go to a different goodwill to look for shoes. also one of my friends (that I’m not going w but might end up hanging out w) wants to take me to an after party after prom but I think I’m riding w my other friend so that wouldn’t work?? also my mother would kiLL me but i wanT the experience ya know???

Yeah sorry, I could go on and on about nutrition and being vegan, I guess it's good to have a passion and research to back it up, but at the same time I don't want to be overly preachy and annoying so it's hard to find a balance

also there’s a ton of bítćh âśš sophomores who pretended to be juniors and bought their own tickets ew. the lady selling them doesn’t even check what grade you’re in she just asks “junior or senior” and those sophomores are like iM a JuNiOr hEhE

wow that was like all me and no u IM SO HAPPY FOR YOUUUU I love to see you thriving and doing what you love and talk about what’s going right in your life and ahahahhhhhhhh 💛💛💛

I'm trying not to do anything impulsive. It's hard. I think I'm going to tell my best friend I started self-harming again (I promised her I'd stop again in October, then started again in January and I haven't told her because I don't want to hurt her), but I have to wait until after this concert and after I have Easter with her and her family because I don't want to ruin it for her, but it's so hard not talking to her...

She used to tell me if I didn't take it seriously and try to fight it then she wouldn't be able to be as close to me, sort of like an ultimatum thing to show me how serious it is. I'm just really scared she'll leave me. It's not like I don't try to fight it... I do... but I can't commit to stopping again... I've promised myself twice and it didn't work longer than a couple months and it helps me even if it's not healthy, and I don't know, it's all so confusing... She'll never be able to trust me again and I know I deserve that for lying to her for three months, but it still hurts...

She used to struggle with pretty severe depression. She tells me that when I talk about hurting myself and actually doing it, then it stresses her out so much she wants to hurt herself. I can't live with myself knowing I'm hurting her like that. I just don't know if she's in an okay enough place to carry my problems when she has her own

I think she really, really wants to be strong enough to help me through this, but I just don't know if she is. I don't know what I'm going to do. But thank you for your advice and your story about what you and Tristin went through, that really helps

sooo cute

re/ yes i do heh😎

dang those are good