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When I realized I wasnt straight the first rule I made for myself was I wouldn't like any of my friends. I broke that rule. When you told our friend group you were bi, it gave me false hope for somthing that would never happen. Going into the crush I knew that I was digging myself a hole.
Its really stupid in hindsight, The last thing I wanted was to make anything awkward or to lose you as a friend, and I think I did both.